not swinging

Threesomes, foursomes and moresomes are great. Recreational sex in general is great. I don't think I need to call myself a swinger though; I just enjoy sex, and that's that. And I can't really call myself a swinger when I'm not actually swinging. And right now, I'm not. The boyfriend and I made a mutual decision over the weekend - after he asked me to go to a club and I declined - to steer clear of the whole swinging thing for the time being.

(note that I highlighted the word 'mutual' - this will be because we don't often make mutual decisions, heh. Usually, he decides one thing, I decide another. But I digress.)

I was rather shocked at myself for being so bloody sensible instead of completely hedonistic, but quietly, I was also very pleased with myself for learning and respecting the number one lesson in swinging: there's a time and a place for it. And right now it's neither the time nor the place. We need to navigate this ongoing BDSM dilemma first... if we can. Don't quite know how at the minute, but as the saying goes, better to do it right than to do it right now. I'm certainly not naive enough to think it's going to happen overnight.

Dominance and submission never happens overnight.

It's very much a 'journey' - a word I remember the boyfriend mocking last year, but it really is the best descriptive. It's a trip into the dark side, and like any good journey there is exploration, discovery, adventure, and little pots of magic that make your spine tingle.

And like any other journey, it's taken one step at a time.