school days

When I think about my school days, I often wonder if all junior schools have this underlying sexual thing going on that my own seemed to, or if it was just something me (and a few select others) bore witness to - and participated in.

We used to play Kiss-Chase, the rules of which were simple: run away. If you're 'caught', the catcher was allowed to kiss you on the cheek (before running off and giggling with his mates). I'm quite surprised that despite being one of the top sprinters at school, I was always getting caught ;)

We used to play a more risqué version of that game as well: Knicker-Chase. The rules of this were also very simple: run away. If you're caught, the catcher is allowed to see your knickers. I was not caught so often in this game - but still more than I would've 'liked'. Although if I didn't like it that much, I doubt I would've been playing it in the first place.

Both of these games would take place in the playground, in perfect view of everyone, students and teachers and dinner-ladies alike. And because they did, it always seemed perfectly acceptable to play them. I didn't really feel 'dirty' showing a boy my knickers - just embarrassed.

There was another game that we used to play though. One that did make me feel dirty and embarrassed. One that didn't take place in the playground, but rather in the dark and dingy recess that we called the cloakroom. Concealed behind a sea of anoraks and donkey-jackets and fluffy pink coats, was a game I never did catch the name of. But it involved being surrounded by five or six boys, and being molested in a way that only boys of that age could. Hands in my knickers, and in my top... I would love to say it only happened once, but it didn't. It happened regularly, especially during year 6. The same cloakroom, the same boys, the same feeling of humiliation versus excitement that I still enjoy now... when I get the fucking chance!

And my mother thought I went to a good school... ha!